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This post was written and first published at Typecast2000 blog. As I’m away on holiday, I thought it would be good to share over here as well, as I’m sure you’ll have your own comments about this! Will enjoy reading them on my return.

We don’t have a telly, or a TV card in our house. No means at all of receiving or watching live television. Yet, we have 2 active boys -8yo and 6yo, and we all love watching sport.

The conversation came to a head in the run up to the World Cup (football in case you’ve missed the news recently). My husband felt that maybe now was the time to get a TV in the house. He’s been muttering for a while now about getting one now the boys are getting older.

But “why?” I kept asking. Why do we need something that will sit in one of our family rooms that will become the focus of attention in that room and not each other, or lego, or books that we currently have (all at once today left on the floor!).

Why do we need this piece of machinery that people say “wastes their time” when there’s “nothing on”, (listen to Bruce Springsteen’s song “57 Channels and nothing on”). I hear of parents who leave their children just watching whatever, for however long. It scares me that these children don’t develop their own imagination in quite the same way as those where TV watching is limited.

Why do we need to be forced to have another restriction added to our busy family timetable when the children or hubby declare “Oh, I MUST watch xyz at something o’clock”. MUST? Why so strong? I’ve ‘managed’ without a television since I started work 15 years ago and couldn’t afford the TV licence. I can’t say I’ve ever missed it.

Am I missing something? We certainly haven’t missed having it during the world cup. I’m pleased we haven’t had no.1 son constantly wanting to watch highlights and replays, and have to sit and watch “crucial” games. Yes, BBC5Live has been on a lot, but we can do other things whilst it’s on in the background.

How do you use your telly? For you to “veg out” in front of? For your children to  “wind down” after a hard day at school? Could you manage without a television? Apparently 1% of the population are without televisions. I’m sure we all have our own reasons.

I really cannot see us ever needing or wanting a television. I don’t think the children miss out. I certainly have no idea where I would get time to watch telly! The boys are very creative and imaginative. They play, do sports, go to Beavers and Cubs. They enjoy music and dancing, laughing and computer games and playing with friends.

So, what am I/are we missing out on? I’d love to hear your views.

Last week’s guest blog provoked a lot of discussion. Not just on here, but else where in Blogland and Twitterville. There are so many considerations for parents, (I got told last week that this affects Dads as well as Mums!), when looking at their options about their careers when they start a family. I felt it only right to offer this week’s Friday guest blog spot to Muddling Along Mummy to put her view on this dilemma. Here she is:

I blog as Muddling Along Mummy [www.muddlingalongmummy.com] where I write about trying to navigate through life, work, family and still being myself.

My blog is a finalist in the Best Baby Blog category in the MADs Awards, you can vote for me by following this link if you like what you read! [http://the-mads.com/vote.htm].

I’m also on Twitter as @muddlingalong [www.twitter.com/muddlingalong].

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Last week’s post by Bumbling Tweets has inspired me to continue to talk about the issues faces those of us who are trying to balance the desire to have a career, not just a job, but also to have sufficient space for our families needs.

I went back to work full time after my first was born.  There wasn’t really a question of whether I would go back and in my field there was really no way to get a shorter week.

You see I want to work. continue reading…

Yesterday was the first anniversary of my Mum’s death. And, I just want to reflect.

Mum - happy times

We’ve all survived

Despite thinking that we’d never get through it, my Dad, brother and I are still here. Her grandchilren are growing up, as children do. It’s been very painful. Even though we were expecting her death (she’d had ovarian cancer for 10 years), and had the luxury of saying goodbye, and putting things in order before she died. It was still hard when the final day came.

Mum was a beautiful, loving person, who always thought of others before herself. Even when we were planning her funeral and thanksgiving services together, she was more worried about where people would park in the town centre, than it being the right place to have the service!

Throwing Out

We did a lot of clearing out Mum’s things very early on. I spent a lot of last summer driving up and down the M6 to clear Mum’s clothes and her craft shed. She was a fanatical crafter & flower arranger. We all loved her for her generosity and the beautiful things she made. But we had so much stuff we held a sale in the Village Hall in aid of McMillan Cancer last September. continue reading…

When Erica’s Guest Post Day came around again, I was keen to join in. And I was really excited to be paired up with T-J. I am so impressed by all the mums I meet in the blogging and twitter community who run their own businesses, and fit in being mums too.

So who am I? I’m bumbling, and I blog over at BumblingAlong.wordpress.com, and am addicted to twitter, where I tweet as @BumblingTweets.

Swapping blogs with T-J for the day has made me think even more about that thorny topic of working mums. I’ve recently been mulling over that balance between work, career, ambition and achievement, and home, life, family and children. It’s a toughie. I’m certain I’m not getting it right, but I’m not convinced their is a right answer.

From the outside looking in, I envy women like T-J who have taken their entrepreneurial spirit and built their own business that fits around their life. But I bet that it’s not all a bed of roses from the inside.  It’s a path I’m interested in, but am scared to take. Scared because it’s a risk, and not just for fear of embarrassment if I don’t succeed, but also because I need consistent earnings for us to continue to live in the manner in which I’ve become accustomed to.

So where I am?

I’m not an entrepreneur – I am an employee. But I am a professional person – a lawyer. Before I had Moo, I worked full time (and more) forging a career in the law, built on my technical skills and my skills as a trainer and mentor.

But I can’t work those hours and look after Moo.

Let’s look at the practicalities. There are no nurseries which open longer hours than 8-6. This does not even let me work a standard working day at my office (9.15 – 5.30) and manage the (relatively short compared to many people) commute. Never mind those extra hours.

And those nurseries are expensive. I’m very lucky – I do earn substantially more per day than I pay in nursery fees, so it is financially viable for me to work. But we spend more on nursery fees than we do on our mortgage. I don’t know how people on lower wages cope. Or those with more than one child in nursery…

But it’s not just about the practicalities. I love being a mum. I really do. Moo is a fantastic little girl – no longer a baby. But I was a lawyer for a long time before I became a mum, and I was a lawyer when I thought that I wouldn’t be able to have children. I studied for 5 years at university. I trained for 2 years. And I’ve been working as a qualified solicitor for almost 9 years (oh my goodness, that makes me sound old!). I put a lot of effort into this career, studying, learning, building expertise, building relationships. If I didn’t have Moo, this is what I would be doing still.

And it’s hard to give that up. When I was on maternity leave, I planned to come back to work full time. As part of a redundancy exercise, my firm asked if anyone was willing to take on flexible working to save jobs, and I volunteered to cut 2 days a week. It seemed like a good opportunity at the time, and would reduce the redundancies in my team.

And now I love having those extra two days a week with Moo.

But in three days a week at work, I can do my job, but not build my career. I’ve been back 6 months, and whilst I still enjoy my job, the spark isn’t there as clearly as it was, because I know I can’t achieve the projects I would like to in these limited hours.

So what gives? My boss would like me to move up to 4, or even 5 days a week.  She thinks I can go places, but I need to put in the work.

Moo is happy at nursery. She loves the contact with other kids and the stimulation they give her there.

But I will miss her. And I’m not sure how I’ll cope with the pressures of career and motherhood. Whatever happens, Moo is my number 1 priority, and if she needs me, I’ll be there. I’ll make sure that the time I do spend with her is quality. But am I wrong in thinking she doesn’t actually need me to be at home as much as I am at the moment? Or should I put my career on hold and spend as much time with her as I can whilst I can…

What a fabulous Easter holidays I’ve had. I have so much more energy and enthusiasm and feel

How can you fail to relax here?

ready to take action on a number of fronts. It is the first proper break I’ve had in a long, long while (see previous post for some reasons if you’re interested), and I can now for the first time in a long time, reap the rewards of a break and a rest.

But why do I feel so good? And how can I repeat it in the future? What can I share with others? Here’s my view, but would be interested in what others think about holidays, rest and getting ourselves ready for all our future activities: continue reading…

I’ve always loved Mother’s Day – the history and traditions. The sharing. The actions to show Mums how much we care and love them. But, I’ve always had my Mum to tell. This year is different.

This year is my first year without Mum being alive. And even though I’m a

My Mum

Mother myself, it feels strange to not be buying cards that mean something special, or planning a gift or action to make her smile and tell her how much I love her. continue reading…

As part of Guest Post Day, set up by @Erica, I’ve swapped my blog post with @iaingilmour whose own blog is an eclectic mix of life, love, music and sheds. I’m sure you’ll enjoy this – very enlightening. Please leave your comments for us, including – should we do this again? Happy Guest Post Day!

Breastfeeding Blog

I’ve always been a bit of a breast man myself.  Many a pleasant hour has been spent admiring my wife’s young roes and I must confess to the occasional fondle when her back wasn’t turned.  And then my wife chose to breastfeed. continue reading…

We all talk about “having too many balls in the air”, “keeping all the plates spinning”, or simply, “having too much to do, and too little time”. And we think of it as negative.

What's important to us?

But why not turn it around and look at all the positives that our busy lives can give us? I’ve had one hell of a week (and I don’t usually use language like that!), but I’m still here with my house, family and business, so what have I got to complain about? continue reading…

Roses for Valentine's Day

Yesterday was Valentine’s Day. The anniversary of my husband asking me to marry him. The day we all celebrate love and relationships. The first anniversary of my Mum’s hip cracking at the beginning of the end of her life through cancer. And, my Nan’s 96th birthday.

And we didn’t mark it in any way. continue reading…